Priceless
Bismillahirrahmanirrahim.
All praises to Him that it's already a month (approximately) that KMS has become a part of me. Though this may sound cliche, indeed time flies so fast that I'm now a college student who's only a step away in getting what she has craved for since forever (haha forever lah sangat, waktu Form 3 je baru dapat ilham Allah bagi nak pergi oversea ni ha).
I know that I've wronged gazillion times before and am quite certain that mistakes + sins will be made every day as long as I'm breathing. We are made of imperfections. But He has always believed that us, the imperfect human beings are the most perfect creature who will bring goodness to the world (in performing our duty as His khalifah), who will be in His heaven (and an-Nar as well), there in the afterlife.
Through the true stories that were told to me via the countless talks/sharing sessions here in KMS or maybe through the TV programmes etc, I come to the realisation that Allah is indeed Forgiving.
I was a very bad girl during high school (eceh gaya macam dah lama benar tinggalkan zaman sekolah pulak), really. Maybe people perceived me as a so-called 'good' Amalina back then, but truly, only Allah (and I) knows how sinful I was, how sinful I am, still.
And yet, He still rewarded me with beautiful things in life that are priceless;
learning to get back up when life pushed me down the cliff,
learning to be resigned with the fate,
learning to feel that I was & am actually 'filthy',
the ease(s) that He provided when facing big exams plus the headaches and 'heartaches',
the result that I attained for those 2 big exams,
the desire to actually want to be here as to feel closer to Him
and last but not least,
nikmat iman dan Islam yang tak ada gantinya.
I feel that I don't deserve all those things, as I have done soooooooooo many flaws.
One of the 'abangs' that gave the tazkirah here said, when we actually feel the need to do something to correct ourselves and when we feel that we have gone too far from the right track, that is one way of Allah telling us to come to Him, to long for Him :')
Allah is so kind that He still gives us opportunity of living a new life when we are waken by the sound of our alarm clock in the phone, every morning.
When feeling hopeless, you must convince yourself that there is no other entity that will forgive you as much as Allah does every day in your life. In fact, He wants you to repent and avoid doing the same mistakes over and over again, just because He loves you.
One crucial thing that you have to keep in mind is;
even though it is undeniable that Allah is All-Forgiving towards His servants, you can never take His kindness for granted. This means that you cannot simply tell yourself that "Alah tak apa lah, buat dosa hari ni, malam nanti aku doa lah mintak Allah ampunkan dosa aku". A big NO here, missy!
His kindness is not for the people who expect to be forgiven by repeating the same line "Ya Allah, aku bertaubat" but at the same time having the intention of doing another sins the very next day.
Usaha ke arah untuk tidak melakukan kesalahan tapi pada masa yang sama berdoa setiap hari supaya diampunkan dosa, yang lalu dan yang akan datang.
Amal, we both know that you are not the good girl that everybody sees with their naked eyes but please, don't you ever give up in seeking for His forgiveness. That particular mistake that you did can never be done again in the future. You must protect yourself against the 'penyakit hati/qalb' that are deathly.
Make full use of this chance that Allah gives to you (the fact that you are currently living in a very good place [Kolej MARA Seremban] to start transforming yourself into the Optimus Prime.
I am thankful that I am here in KMS, I am grateful that the people here are willing to share their knowledge about Islam every day through the usrah, the sharing sessions and all, I can never express my happiness that Allah has brought me here to start learning how to be a better me. This is mere musing of a nobody and yes, segala yang baik itu datang daripada Allah, yang buruk itu memang saya punya share.
I pray that we are all going to meet in His jannah soon.
*Ramadan is leaving and I still feel that I haven't done enough to fully utilise the time that I have in this holy month. Nevertheless, I know that I am fortunate enough that He still allows me to meet Ramadan this year. I silently pray that we are going to see Ramadan again next year, amin amin.
**A sister once told me (not in her exact words la tapi),
All praises to Him that it's already a month (approximately) that KMS has become a part of me. Though this may sound cliche, indeed time flies so fast that I'm now a college student who's only a step away in getting what she has craved for since forever (haha forever lah sangat, waktu Form 3 je baru dapat ilham Allah bagi nak pergi oversea ni ha).
I know that I've wronged gazillion times before and am quite certain that mistakes + sins will be made every day as long as I'm breathing. We are made of imperfections. But He has always believed that us, the imperfect human beings are the most perfect creature who will bring goodness to the world (in performing our duty as His khalifah), who will be in His heaven (and an-Nar as well), there in the afterlife.
Through the true stories that were told to me via the countless talks/sharing sessions here in KMS or maybe through the TV programmes etc, I come to the realisation that Allah is indeed Forgiving.
I was a very bad girl during high school (eceh gaya macam dah lama benar tinggalkan zaman sekolah pulak), really. Maybe people perceived me as a so-called 'good' Amalina back then, but truly, only Allah (and I) knows how sinful I was, how sinful I am, still.
And yet, He still rewarded me with beautiful things in life that are priceless;
learning to get back up when life pushed me down the cliff,
learning to be resigned with the fate,
learning to feel that I was & am actually 'filthy',
the ease(s) that He provided when facing big exams plus the headaches and 'heartaches',
the result that I attained for those 2 big exams,
the desire to actually want to be here as to feel closer to Him
and last but not least,
nikmat iman dan Islam yang tak ada gantinya.
I feel that I don't deserve all those things, as I have done soooooooooo many flaws.
One of the 'abangs' that gave the tazkirah here said, when we actually feel the need to do something to correct ourselves and when we feel that we have gone too far from the right track, that is one way of Allah telling us to come to Him, to long for Him :')
Allah is so kind that He still gives us opportunity of living a new life when we are waken by the sound of our alarm clock in the phone, every morning.
When feeling hopeless, you must convince yourself that there is no other entity that will forgive you as much as Allah does every day in your life. In fact, He wants you to repent and avoid doing the same mistakes over and over again, just because He loves you.
One crucial thing that you have to keep in mind is;
even though it is undeniable that Allah is All-Forgiving towards His servants, you can never take His kindness for granted. This means that you cannot simply tell yourself that "Alah tak apa lah, buat dosa hari ni, malam nanti aku doa lah mintak Allah ampunkan dosa aku". A big NO here, missy!
His kindness is not for the people who expect to be forgiven by repeating the same line "Ya Allah, aku bertaubat" but at the same time having the intention of doing another sins the very next day.
Usaha ke arah untuk tidak melakukan kesalahan tapi pada masa yang sama berdoa setiap hari supaya diampunkan dosa, yang lalu dan yang akan datang.
*
Amal, we both know that you are not the good girl that everybody sees with their naked eyes but please, don't you ever give up in seeking for His forgiveness. That particular mistake that you did can never be done again in the future. You must protect yourself against the 'penyakit hati/qalb' that are deathly.
Make full use of this chance that Allah gives to you (the fact that you are currently living in a very good place [Kolej MARA Seremban] to start transforming yourself into the Optimus Prime.
I am thankful that I am here in KMS, I am grateful that the people here are willing to share their knowledge about Islam every day through the usrah, the sharing sessions and all, I can never express my happiness that Allah has brought me here to start learning how to be a better me. This is mere musing of a nobody and yes, segala yang baik itu datang daripada Allah, yang buruk itu memang saya punya share.
I pray that we are all going to meet in His jannah soon.
*Ramadan is leaving and I still feel that I haven't done enough to fully utilise the time that I have in this holy month. Nevertheless, I know that I am fortunate enough that He still allows me to meet Ramadan this year. I silently pray that we are going to see Ramadan again next year, amin amin.
**A sister once told me (not in her exact words la tapi),
"kalau kita jadi hamba Ramadan, ketahuilah bahawa Ramadan akan pergi. Tapi kalau kita jadi hamba Allah, ketahulilah bahawa Allah akan sentiasa ada."
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