Her Waffle

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim. At times of ease, I always tell myself that if I were to face harsh times, I must be fully prepared for the worst. It is as if I can maintain my composure when dealing with difficulties. That was what I thought and yet, I could not even hold my tears when hearing a news that broke my heart. We can easily ask people to do this and that, whilst we are the one who'd be struggling to practise what we preached. Allah is merely testing me on this one thing that I've always asked from Him - to make my heart feels resigned if things don't go the way I want them to be. It's actually hard to be patient, it's difficult to not get disappointed if we have already put high hopes in something that we really really really want to happen. I must admit that I have a problem dealing with my own heart, especially jealousy (I silently pray that it is not going to transform me into a girl with hasad). I don't want to stay the same me, I want to be mo...

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim. Months passed by and I didn't actually realise that I've gone through multiple phases of life that has somewhat changed me. Afterall, I didn't expect all these things to happen. A person pointed out that I have changed and deep down inside, I know that it's a good one - a good change. If today is a better day than yesterday, that's an accomplishment. An achievement that we should thank Allah for because He is the One who lets us becoming better in the first place. I have heard this one person talking about the intention of changing. We need not let ourselves know that we're undergoing a phase that is responsible in changing us in a good way because that might disrupt the pureness of the intention...I think? Maybe the thing that we should do instead is to remind ourselves that whatever happens, it's all due to His power that everything would be impossible if He doesn't say Kun faya kun. Like what Brother Nouman Ali Khan s...